


Gone

by akl1



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, LIKE A LOT OF ANGST, M/M, analogical - Freeform, dukeceit, hooo boy, implied ships, royality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2021-01-04 00:34:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21188603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akl1/pseuds/akl1
Summary: “We’re not supposed to be here. None of us should be standing here in dark black clothes with lumps in our throats, on the verge of breaking down like we did yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that.” Logan shifted, adjusting his hair.Tilting his chin up, he gazed over the small crowd of four, all of whom he knew too well- but one person was missing. That person was lying beside him.In a coffin.





	Gone

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so, BIG trigger warnings for this entire work- suicide, death, grief and angst!

"We-" He cleared his throat, as his voice came out raspy.

“We’re not supposed to be here. None of us should be standing here in dark black clothes with lumps in our throats, on the verge of breaking down like we did yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that.” Logan shifted, adjusting his hair.

Tilting his chin up, he gazed over the small crowd of four, all of whom he knew too well- but one person was missing. That person was lying beside him.

In a coffin.

Logan swallowed. “Whenever I watched a silly romance movie, and in said movie a loved one-” He hesitated, “-dies, I always found the scene where they remember the deceased, and say something along the lines of ‘I took their presence for granted’ unrealistic, or corny. I thought I would never be in such a place.”

A dry chuckle slipped from his lips.

“Falsehood.”

He looked up from the small stack of papers clutched in his hand, towards the window.

“It’s raining,” he said.

“Virgil always loved the rain. He could stare out the window for hours upon hours, feeling so calm and relaxed whenever there were storms. Most would expect him to be alarmed, but the deep rumble of thunder paired with the soft pitter-pattering of rain was one of the things that he loved most.”

A lone tear ran down his cheek; he didn’t notice it.

"He was special, you know. I've never encountered such a resigned yet… loving person. He was the one who introduced me to astrology and showed me the wonders that the night sky can hold."

"To this day, he reminds me of the galaxy. To some people it may seem cold or intimidating, with it's darkness, but to others, it's warm and wondrous with it's light. At first glance it the galaxy may seem like nothing special, just balls of gas and rocks floating in a big nothingness, but if you take the time to look closer you'll start to find miracles. Wonders. Beauty in a place you assumed bleak."

He shifted as nostalgic memories entered his mind of him and Virgil lying on a hill at night- Virgil pointing out constellations and telling interesting facts about space. This memory, though comforting at first now turned a daunting reminder of someone lost. Someone gone.

He looked down at his papers, turning over to the final page.

"But, in the end, there's a bitter truth that we must all come to terms with, sooner or later. Virgil-" His voice cracked on uttering his name.

"Virgil is gone. And there is nothing that we can do about it. Virgil is gone now and he is gone tomorrow and gone overmorrow. We will grieve and we will cry and we will wish with all our might that what experience now is just a cruel nightmare. But it's not."

The only thing that was holding Logan together was the final paragraph he had painstakingly written down, and though he practically knew it off by heart, he kept looking down at it.

"We love him. We all loved Virgil and we will miss him so, so much. He was… Well, he was Virgil. Our anxious stormcloud."

He looked beyond his friends' broken faces, eyes unfocused and in another world.

"May he rest in peace." His last words were a gentle whisper, doused in anguish. Logan silently gathered his papers and glanced over at the open coffin; his pale face too perfect to be real- to be alive. There was no smudged eyeshadow or bag under his eye. there was no dimple on his cheek with a lopsided smirk accompanying it. His hair wasn't covering half of his face. It was all so blank- so _wrong_.

He walked down to sit beside Patton, whose eyes remained glossed over, just as they were when he found out the news.

Patton handed Logan the flower he had brought, as it was easier to hold the papers without having to hold the bouquet as well. He had brought Candytuft, as the soft purple colour was Virgil's favourite.

It's funny, he thought, a flower with a name so sweet for a time so bitter.

"Would anyone like to view Virgil for the- last time?"

Patton and Roman shook their heads, but Dee and Remus slowly nodded. Dee let Remus go first, waiting patiently for his turn.

An uncomfortable silence enveloped the room. It's ironic, he used to love the silence and constantly complained about all the noise everyone was making. But now he wanted nothing more than to hear his friends talk and laugh and interact. He knew that that was not going to happen for a while- hell, maybe forever. He might never hear his friends laugh or joke around or be comfortable in their own damn skins beca-

"-gan?"

He snapped out of his trance, looking up to find Dee.

"Yeah?"

"We should go." Dee replied.

Logan nodded- the coffin still had to be lowered into his grave, and he thought best to get it over with.

* * *

It had stopped raining, but the chilly autumn breeze was still present. They made their way over to the grave, dread crawling up their spines. The mere sight of the grave was horrific.

Noone had spoke a word during the lowering. They were all feeling too much they didn't dare open their mouths. Everyone was just _tired_. They all threw in their various purple flowers onto the coffin as a final farewell to Virgil.

Logan decided to move further away from the rest and called a taxi. Looking back at his friends as he waited for the taxi to arrive, he could see Roman leaning against a solemn Remus.

The two got closer after the death, for fairly obvious reasons. They both needed an anchor, and they quickly resolved their feuds in their desperate time of need. Though Logan didn't necessarily miss the constant bickering and fighting, it was weird regardless without it.

Shifting his gaze over, he could see Patton's arm hugging Dee's waist, pulling him close. They were both hunched over, too tired to care about insignificant things like their posture. It was bittersweet, really. The two of them, like the twins could barely get along before, and here they were, supporting each other.

Soon, the taxi arrived, and they all got in. Quietly.

**Author's Note:**

> hooooo boy onto the angst train :)


End file.
